Goodbye to Kendra

 

It has been my good fortune over the years to be associated with some true soldiers. Men and women who have a steadfast dedication to duty. Soldiers who stand resolute in their aim to defeat the enemy, no matter what it takes. They are never flashy, publicity seeking, begging-for-attention folks. They are always givers, not takers. They own a quiet strength.

The same qualities applied to a tiny 42 year old woman that we have known since she was a child.

Kendra Whittington had breast cancer. By the time she discovered it, it was well advanced. Oncologist referred to it as stage 4. Many parts of her body were affected. Kendra wasn’t content to give up and await the seemingly inevitable. Instead she amassed an army of friends and relatives who were positive thinkers like her, and chose to do battle. She fought the cancer into remission and enjoyed life longer than anyone could have expected. Some time later, the cancer returned, and with a vengeance. This time cancer was stronger. It took her from us. It took two years for her to succumb to a cancer that often takes its victims in weeks. She lost the battle to cancer… but she won the war.

Although her body was riddled with cancer, it was the battle of the mind that Kendra was fighting. She was fighting self pity, soul-numbing depression, anger. She was fighting all the natural responses to a terminal illness. She was determined to smile every mile. To live everyday in a positive way.

Kendra had an arsenal of weapons to fight with. She blazed away at self-pity with an attitude of gratitude. She was grateful for all God had given her. Glad for her faith, her husband, her family, her friends and work. She chose to concentrate on what she had been given, not on what the cancer was taking away.

She disarmed the blackness of depression with the light of a smile that was as beautiful as an ocean sunset. Anyone who knew Kendra will mention her big smile. She wore it until the moment she left her sickened body behind.

While her body was losing to cancer, her soul was winning the real battle. Her body was in depreciation, but her mind was on appreciation. Appreciation for all that she knew and understood about the Kingdom she was heading for. In her last hours she said she “couldn’t wait to see what was on the other side.” While she was sad to have to go, she tried to keep the ones she loved from being too sad. She, like any true soldier, wanted to protect the ones she loved. In her last hours she made a video to say goodbye. From her deathbed and through the haze of illness and medicines, she said ‘goodbye and I love you’ to her friends and family. She was smiling through the recording. She joked and smiled till her last conscious moments, then slipped into the water to swim to the other shore.

We will bury her body today in a little country cemetery in the town where she lived. But her smile cannot be buried, it has shown so brightly as to burn into the memory of us all. I’ll see it in the flickering flames of the fireplace she loved so much in our house. Others will see it in the sun over the ocean waters, or in a painting she left on their wall. Her smile will be with us always.

Her giggle and laugh will not be gone. It resounds in the ocean she loved so much, with every crashing wave. We will hear it in the songs she loved, and in nearly every remembered conversation with her. Her laugh will be with us always.

Her husband Scot, another dedicated soldier, who cared for her so tenderly throughout all her illness, will never be without some part of her. She loved and appreciated him more than anything.

Kendra has inspired us all. She has challenged us too. We have her example of strength in the face of adversity. She faced her adversaries with a smile, and killed them with kindness.

She was a wonder, this girl. We loved her. She was after all, a true soldier.

A footnote: 900 people came to Kendras' Visitation. Over 500 were at her funeral.

Goodbye To Kendra

Our hearts are aching, we are left forlorn

A vital piece is missing, the fabric torn

There is a void, this empty space

That only you could fill in all your grace

The smile that warmed us is gone away

The laughter that cheered us is absent today


There are lessons still, we needed you to teach

But they have washed away like sand on the beach

Oh how we want you with us, need you here

But couldn’t wish back the pain and the fear.


No, our God knew far better than we

That your work was done here, your mission complete

It was time to head home, to that eternal shore

Where suffering and worry are nevermore


Your courage and love are with us still

As is your example, of continuing in His will

We will see your face in the oceans white capped waves

And meet you on the shores of Heavens eternal day


Kevin L. Dennie, May, 2012

Kendra And Scot Whittington